Time wasters

I don't like it when people waste my time. I don’t want to know who you work for, who you picked to win on your last bracket, what you thought about the traffic on the drive to work, or how your sister-in-law insulted your last Thanksgiving side dish when anyone—anyone!—would tell you that the aforementioned side dish is obviously superior to her candied yams. I consider anyone who insists on informing me of any of the above—or a thousand other—details about him/herself to be a colossal time waster.

I'd tell you to ask any of my friends, family, or coworkers, but then that would mean you would know who I was, and, shocker, I'm not interested in you knowing who I am, either.

At least I’m consistent.

Summary point: Time wasters irritate me. They especially irritate me when the time-wasting offense happens on a Monday morning when we have 200+ applications that need sorting from the weekend. Monday is the day I need to be the most efficient with my time, or I'll be behind for the rest of the week. And being behind at work irritates me.

If you haven't figured it out yet, a lot of things irritate me. Surprise.

Now, in order to sort through 200+ Monday morning applications, I need to make a quick determination as to who I feel is solid enough to call, who is ok enough to send a quick text to (and they can decide if they want to call me to follow up on their application), and who sucks and doesn't require any further follow up except to discard his/her application in the digital equivalent of balling up a piece of paper and chucking it at a trashcan.

[Sidenote: If you knew me, which you don't, thank God, you would know that I have terrible hand-eye coordination. Throwing wadded up balls of paper at a trashcan would inevitably end up with wadded up balls of paper littered all over the floor for me to clean up later. Another source of irritation. So, thank goodness the digital equivalent exists in this day and age. Huzzah.]

I feel like we are getting away from the point of this post, though. Let’s regroup: Time wasters. Let me give you an example.

Me: Good morning. I'm calling to follow up on the employment application you submitted for XX company. Do you have time now to chat, or would you like to give me a call at a time that works better for you? It'll take about 15 or so minutes.

TW (Time Waster): No, I have time now.

Me: Perfect. As I stated, you applied for XX company. It looks like you left your last company a few months ago. Why did that position end, and what interested you about XX company?

TW: Uh, can I call you back? I'm kinda busy at the moment.

Me: <grinds teeth> Sure, we'll be available until 4pm.

Incidentally, the point where any one TW eventually says he/she doesn’t have time to talk can come after the first couple of questions, or we can get solidly into the middle of the interview before they decide they don't have time. It irritates me, and I don’t think I am alone in this one. I gave you a rough estimate of how long the call would take. I gave you an opportunity to figure out if you had that time to spare and an offer to call me back at a different time. Instead, you told me you're free, so we start something, and then you bail.

I'm fine with someone saying they don't have time now and will need to call back. Great. You know how to handle your time, and you know when you can and cannot (or should or should not) take a call that will last about 15 minutes. For those who cannot seem to manage their time and decide to waste mine, rest assured the end result is a scathing note in the applicant file about challenges with time management. As well as a silent hope that they never call back.

At which point I take a moment to throw the application at the digital trashcan and congratulate myself when the application (always) hits the mark.