It. Is. Required.

Does anyone else subscribe to the notion that there are only seven original storylines in human history, and everything otherwise created by man is simply a derivative of one of the original seven?

I am.

Although…it just occurred to me that there are ALSO seven original sins. Is that symbolic of something?

Argh. I digress.

Anyway: the seven original plots. Let’s start counting:

1. Man with a storied past falls in love with the one woman who can see through his pain and get him to feel hope in the world again. Unicorns and rainbows for everyone.

2. Man and woman fall in love, but the family doesn’t agree. I suspect we have all heard of this one.

3. Man and woman have a lovely, fulfilling relationship, but one of them dies a horrible death. With a touching death scene that leaves room for another love, mind you. Neither unicorns nor rainbows and a whole lot of tissues.

4. Woman escapes terrible tragedy and learns to live again. Usually by finding a career arc that inexplicably pays a lot better than her previous career (that latter bit may be a more modern outtake on the classic).

5. …I’m tired, but you get the idea.

Recruiting is kind of like the seven original plots. If I was going to type something truly original, I’d stop at seven posts and call the thing complete. Yet, here I am, continuously finding more and more fodder to post online.

Example? Sure.

Let’s start with the lede: Currently, 95% of our positions require some amount of previous position-specific experience.

A client that makes components for pacemakers requires previous (and recent) assembly-using-a-microscope experience. Presumably because it's a real downer to train someone who has never used a microscope for a position that requires someone to hunch over a microscope for the entirety of the shift only to have the freshly-minted graduate turn around and decide, "Naw, I don't like this".

I can’t really blame the would-be employer: don't waste the time, effort, and money training someone only to have them up and quit. Instead, hire someone with relevant experience. Then, the person coming in for training is already used to the scope, so it won't come as a surprise that it sucks (IMHO) and we can skip the I-know-you-will-quit-right-after-training part.

Just the other day, I took several calls from people who had zero relatable or relevant experience to such a position. After telling them that their work experience will not be a match for what the client is requiring, they, every bloomin’ one of them, said something along the lines of "that's ok" and they're "fast learners" and "will pick it up quick."

I'm sure.

But, also, not the point.

The point is that the hiring manager is not even going to look at a resume that doesn't have relatable, relevant experience for the position. I don't care what you tell me, I'm telling you, you're not a match for the client's requirements. I will not send your cashier resume to a medical assembly hiring manager requiring previous microscope assembly experience. It's a waste of my and my client's time.

And, frankly, since you obviously can neither read nor listen, you're probably not going to be a match for a technical position for a host of reasons other than the no-relatable-experience one.